Here we go again...
So, today... I got the talk from the guy whom I'm seeing. And basically, he told me he's unsure about certain factors, and that he feels that he cannot provide me with what I want... This was basically, in my opinion, a very nice way of being dumped. Yes, I got dumped. Again... Surprise, surprise...
And this time, what bugs me the most is that I feel very used. When I first met this guy, he apparently really liked my appearance, and so basically had intercourse with me. And even though he was honest, polite and told me the truth, which I appreciated. I feel very used. I feel that he used me to get his nuts off, and that was it. Perhaps I'm being melodramatic, but that's how I feel. If you weren't sure of what you wanted, don't act like you do... And don't have sex with me. Cuz at first, he looked like he knew what he wanted, and now he tells me he doesn't. Or he feels that what he's looking for is different than what I'm looking for at the moment. And he may re-examine where things are going/leading in the future. This is just basically a nice way of dumping.
I really need to buy that book, Love: A Polemic. Perhaps when I have more money.
I also just got off the phone with my parents... I did my dutiful calling to them... And my mother told me that I have to be careful when I go to those gay/lesbian/bisexual/trans-identified meeting places, because they are dirty, and they are the source of the infestation of bed bugs. Clearly ignoring that the source is unknown, and that most researchers believe it's due to increased international travel, as well as the banning of substances such as DDT, which reduced the number of bed bugs drastically, and the illegality of the fumigation of insects. And I was talking to my brother, and he had a field day. He started saying that all the world's problems are with the gays... World Hunger exists, because of gays. HIV/AIDS exists because of gays. The war in Lebanon exists, because of gays. Being someone who works in public health (even not as a PHI), how can he/she be so misinformed in regards to bed bug infestations?
On goes the power music... Welcome back, Willa, Gloria and others who provide the music that I so need.
posted by radoboist @ 5:59 PM
1 Comments:
Listen to Frank Mills' "Happy Music". It's aptly named.
What I'm about to write next is going to be harsh, but I'll be straightforward with you in the hopes that you're not going to get yourself hurt over and over again.
Re:
"When I first met this guy, he apparently really liked my appearance, and so basically had intercourse with me." and "If you weren't sure of what you wanted, don't act like you do... And don't have sex with me."
These thoughts bug me. It takes two to tango, remember? Don't make yourself an easy laid, because it sounds as though you let others do whatever they want to you and you won't hesitate to jump into bed with the first guy who's willing to have sex with you.
People can sense easy laids a mile off. You're allowing people to use you.
I mean, this won't matter if you like the feeling of being used, or if you do enjoy having sex with people with whom you don't share strong emotional ties, but it sounds as though it does bother you. So hold off until YOU are certain about the guy. Were you certain about him? Have you been placing all your trust in him?
How long have you known this guy? How well do you think you know him? How well do you think he knows you? If I were to ask you a bunch of questions about him (like how the US Consulate officer had grilled me about Jason), would you be confident that you could answer all my questions?
I don't know anything about this book, Love: A Polemic. Is it available through your public library? Do you mean AGAINST Love: A Polemic, btw? Cuz it's available through the Toronto Public Library. 13 copies... but if it's a self-help kinda book, I'll pass. Not my type of reading =) I read for escapism.
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